2am: Wandering Aimlessly 4 Blocks from my House

Hey,

At 2am last night, 100% sober, walking back and forth, trying to figure out “where the hell is my house?” Looking back it’s a comical situation since anyone that knows me, knows my sense of direction is awful. I’ve been in Bombay for nearly a month. But it was pitch dark, been a long day (which I’ll describe in a sec), I’m wearing my fancy smancy blue suit, with dress shoes, my white untucked shirt full of sweat stains and smut. One of the 7 new foods/drinks I’d tried that day had gone through me fast and I really needed to use the bathroom. Damn. Let me describe the day with pictures and such and get back to the situation where I almost pooped in my pants at 2am wandering aimlessly 4 blocks from my house:

Part 1: Woke up, ate some food that was super tasty but didn’t know the name of it (that is a lot of my breakfasts and lunches) and of course drank my Mate (which I brought from the Americas…I’m so fancy!)

Saturday – 9am: Bombay/Mumbai* Teacher Celebration Event

*FYI, will use the two names interchangeably. It’s super complicated why the name change happened: “Officially, in 1995. That year, the right-wing Hindu nationalist party Shiv Sena won elections in the state of Maharashtra and presided over a coalition that took control of the state assembly. After the election, the party announced that the port city had been renamed after the Hindu goddess Mumbadevi, the city’s patron deity. Federal agencies, local businesses, and newspapers were ordered to adopt the change. They argued that “Bombay” was a corrupted English version of “Mumbai” and an unwanted legacy of British colonial rule. “

I digress…Been at my job for a week.  At the end of the year we celebrate all the teachers we worked with.  We are in 3 cities: Mumbai, Hyderabad and Bangalore.   Elementary and High School teachers in India (from my understanding) are not well respected, get paid low low salaries, and work in insane conditions (50-60 students to one teacher, tiny classrooms, etc.)  For my education people I’ll explain in a separate conversation.  Anyway nice event. Got to meet some incredible teachers and principals.  Here are some pics of the teachers:

 

Saturday – 11am: Taxi to Airport

A couple of us had to rush to airport to get a flight to Hyderabad for the next celebration event that started at 3:30pm.

Saturday – 3:30pm: Hyderabad Celebration Event

So much stimulation! Just imagine:

• First week on the job
• Most of the events are in Hindi (I really need to learn that language fast!)
• Hyderabad, first time there and so much history there.
• I have a strange English accent.  I introduce myself as Josh.  What people always hear and repeat back is: JAYESH …So I’ve started just using Joshua.
• A lot of networking and small talk.
• In my neurotic head always trying to norms: “Do I shake this person’s hand?  Do I wait for them to reach their hand out?  Can I look them in the eye? Smile? Don’t smile? Sit down? Stand? etc etc…but this stuff is important.
• All types of crazy food and drinks (raw sugar cane juice – tasty! or spicy buttermilk – not my scene) food is full of complicated layered flavors. Even the spicy is complex (some that hurt your tongue e.g. chilly powder, others that hurt your throat e.g. black pepper)

“One constant is people have been ridiculously accommodating and kind!”   

Someone taking a pic of me doing Selfie with some of the people I work with:

 

Saturday – 6:30pm Debrief

Very nice event.  Then we have to walk fast to a cafe.  But everyone is all nonchalant cuz they’ve done that walk a gazillion times.  And I’m like:  “holy shit, I’m in the old town of Hyderabad!”   And as everyone is walking to their next destination I’m in tourist mode.  Bazaars, markets, tons of people, beautiful buildings, mosques…so much history. First video is where everyone in town buys their wedding gear:

 

 

 

 

Saturday 9pm –  Back to Airport to Return to Mumbai

Saturday/Sunday 12:30am – In Taxi trying to figure it out

It’s not like Chicago.  You can’t tell a taxi cab driver: 18th and Ashland or even an address.  People say directions like:  Bandra West (neighborhood), Via Linking Rd (one of the biggest streets) Peeche (behind) KFC (hahaha, that was directions I gave to someone a couple days ago).  Then you turn on your GPS on phone and help them with directions.  Here was the problem: My phone battery died.  So I told him: Santa Cruz West Station (train station) SV Road (Big street I live near).

Now, because I am basic as hell when it comes to directions.  The driver dropped me there.  I was two blocks from my house and it took me an hour to find my street.  By the way, the drivers have been almost all been honest and helpful.  They just don’t know sidestreets.  Signage is not a thing here.  That is how I almost pooped in my pants at 2am wandering aimlessly 4 blocks from my house.  

Speaking of which, here is a pic of a bathroom where my event was at.  It is a non-western style toilet but supposed to be better to squat that way: